One of my biggest fears in life has always been rejection. It made me hesitant when approaching anything new because I was afraid, no...I was sure, that I would be rejected and thereby embarrassed. I'm sure that the reasons have a lot to do with me being an introvert coupled with my upbringing. Whatever. I've reached a point in my recovery where I've realized that looking backward is going to cause me to crash into the car in front of me that just stopped short. In other words, it's not worth the risk.
I'm learning that it's not all about me. How ridiculous for me to think that when I approach someone, their first thought is about me! I have no idea what is going on in their head or in their lives. They may be thinking, "Hmmm...well she could stand to lose a few pounds," OR they may be thinking, "Wow, what a confident beautiful woman she appears to be." More likely they are thinking, "I forgot to make Vicki's lunch today, I hope she has enough money to buy lunch," OR "I hope he calls me today and asks me out."
For this reason, I'm trying to stop reading things into situations that may or may not be there. I'm trying to take people at face value and assume that everyone is coming from a place of kindness and if they aren't? Well that not really my fault now is it? Nope...that's something that has been building and growing for years.
BUT (you knew there was a "but" didn't you), old habits die hard and these are deeply ingrained in my psyche. So when Blog Nation sent me a rejection notice the other day, I felt the sting of rejection and my face reddened from embarrassment. What's wrong with ME? What's wrong with my blog?
So I read back over the email. First of all, the subject line was, "Your Blog Has Been Removed from Blog Nation". Ouch. Then I ready the email...
The editors at Blog Nation have removed Oh For The Love of…Me from Blog Nation. The blog did not meet our content guidelines, as outlined on our Frequently Asked Questions page. Possible reasons might include a broken URL, a site written in a foreign language, a site without posts, etc. If you feel that this was a mistake on our end, please do not hesitate to contact us.
So I went to the FAQ page, to see what was wrong with me. Why don't you want me? (Notice the use of the word "me".)
Guess what? The only reason I could find was that they don't like blogs with "excessive use of profanity".
Well fuck me naked....THAT's it?
My "excessive profanity" is part of my charm. I am not foul mouthed in my day to day life but damn it all to hell it sure is fun to come out here and say all the things I want to say in the way I want to say it.
So adios Blog Nation. Like some couples after a first date, we're just not right for each other and that's okay. I wish you the best. Ciao!
It's good to know that I'm learning not to let what other people may or may not think of me drive me batshit crazy. So here it is...I know you've been waiting for it...without further ado...(drum roll please)...
Fuck you Blog Nation and the horse you rode in on....