I've been off the plan for awhile now and I'm still trying to eat healthy. I stay away from anything processed. I avoid traditional fast food (even those nasty salads) but I did have my first Subway sub the other night (meh). I'm TRYING to stay away from sugar, white foods, potatoes and legumes.
But it's just like drinking...once you open the door the beast comes sneaking back in...quietly at first and then louder and LOUDER until you find yourself making yourself sick on marked down candy corn from Wal-Mart (okay...maybe that's just me).
I'm trying but unless I'm hyper vigilant I find myself slipping and then all of a sudden I get a case of the "fuck-its" and start eating whatever I want. I've said to the hubs two weekends in a row now, "Starting Monday I'm back on plan. I'm getting out of control." Only to get to Wednesday or Thursday and find myself eating pasta (or said Subway sandwich) or a small handful of candy corn.
In addition, I've done something to my lower back muscles so I've been moving really slow the last few days and I'm finding it harder and harder to get up and down the steps to the bus or even the ones to the second floor of my home because my knees are also giving me a case of the fits.
Where does it end?
I'm glad you asked, I'll tell you where it ends. It ends one of two places...
- My cholesteral and tryglycerides become out of control and the doctor puts me on medication.
- I go broke shopping for bigger and bigger clothes all the while saying to myself that I need to accept who I am in whatever shape that is.
- I look in the mirror and hate myself more and more everyday. The word "loathe" comes to mind.
- My knees get worse and I find myself channeling my mother as I climb the steps in my home that I love so much.
- I get my shit together and stop eating crap.
- I see my doctor and have my blood work done to see exactly where I am.
- I remain off the scale (that's been excellent btw) and just judge things by how my clothes fit.
- I keep walking, walking, walking (still loving my FitBit).
- I cut out candy in all forms (gotta start somewhere).
- I continue to stay away from white foods (rice, bread and pasta).
- I manage my portions (I'm much better with this also).