Following My Bliss

Graduation from high school, for me, meant planning a wedding and finding a full time job and then, maybe, going to night school for a teaching degree.  The practice marriage ended after two years.  The full time job turned into a career.  School got put on hold for seven years and when I did earn my undergraduate degree, it was in business because I was already firmly ensconced in my banking career.  The saddest part was that even without a degree, I was already making more money than a teacher so really, I couldn't afford to follow my bliss.

What is wrong with this country?  That's another rant post for another day.  Suffice to say, it really pisses me off.

I really hated school and college was no exception.  With the grace of my wonderful husband, I was able to quit my full time job and go back to school where I got a Bachelor of Science Degree in Business with a concentration in Finance.  Try to contain your enthusiasm.  I went full time and committed to four years because I knew I would never do it at night on a part time basis.  First because it would take too long, second because I was only doing it to advance my career (not because I was particularly passionate about finance), and finally because it cut into happy hour.  That one was the deal breaker...duh.

At last count, I have been accepted into four different graduate schools to get my MBA and I've attended two of them.  One I dropped out of because the boys were very little and it was a 45 minute drive, each way, at night, to attend.  The second school was ideal, only five minutes away from home, a great part time program for working adults with great instructors.  This time we moved.

When I got laid off I applied to two more schools, this time for teaching degrees.  I quickly found out that I still couldn't afford to do what I'd always wanted to do which was teach Literature (American, British, English or World...doesn't really matter) to eleventh and twelfth grade students.  (As a matter of fact I have had my head examined.)  So I dropped the idea and found, yet another banking job.  At least, over the years, I've made my way into the learning area of the companies for which I've worked.

It's not that I hate banking because I don't.  There's a big part of me that loves to crunch numbers, help businesses grow and managed their capital.  But there's a bigger part that yearns to follow my bliss...to get a Master's Degree in Literature and see where that takes me.

So that's what I'm going to do.  Somehow, someway and in spite of the fact that I will soon have three kids in college.  I'm investigating online options which are ridiculously expensive but my new company offers some tuition reimbursement so that may help.  I'll look for grants and scholarships for old ladies looking to return to school.  I've already taken the GRE and my verbal scores are excellent (math sucks however) so that part is done.

I think all of the other fits and starts were God's way of saying, "Nope...not this time.  You don't get to go to graduate school until you follow your heart, your bliss, what I built you to do."  I guess we'll see.  I hope we'll see.  Wait...I know we'll see. 

Namaste

"Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls."

~Joseph Campbell