My children will return to school next week. Wait...that's not right.
My grown ass men will either start or return to college next week.
I no longer have a child in the school system (public or private). I am a grandmother, and while I have worn that title proudly for many years (15 to be exact), I have done so with a somewhat smug attitude. After all, my stepdaughter is only 10 years younger than me so really, I wasn't old enough to be a grandmother...technically. Then my niece had children and since my sister had her when she was 17, well...I remained smug.
When my nephew's baby came along it became official - I'm old enough to be a proper grandma.
No kids in school + grandbabies = old. Sigh...
The vast majority of the time I bask in the glow of grandmotherhood and the fact that my "children" have grown into wonderful "adults" (for the most part anyway). However, at times like this, when I look around and realize that the raising part of them has morphed into coaching and supporting, my heart aches for the feel of a little boy who smells like fresh air and dirt jumping into my arms after a day at preschool ready to tell me about his day.
I even miss little boys who come home from school with skinned knees, bumped heads, or hurt feelings and just need their mom to kiss the boo-boo to make it better. The boo-boos they get now need a helluva lot more than a kiss (from me anyway) to make them better. They are grown up boo-boos and most of the time they suck ass...big time.
Damn I'm glad I quit drinking when I did.
This feeling + wine = disaster of epic proportions.
Science Experiment Update
To all you Whole30 or Paleo people out there or just the ones who have ditched sugar, I need some advice. Right now I find myself thinking about food constantly and putting stuff in my face even when I'm not hungry (good stuff like yellow and red peppers and celery or a small amount of nuts). It's like I'm trying to fill a hole and it just won't get full.
I have two questions:
1. Is this because my body wants carbs and I'm not giving it to them? Usually when I have a craving for something, if I don't get it then I end up eating everything on the planet to make it go away. I'm thinking this is the same thing. Yes?
2. Will it pass?
Have a wonderful Friday and a great weekend and remember, don't let anyone steal your happy - including your beast.