Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Day 3 of "The Experiment"



Thanks to everyone for all of your kind and supportive comments regarding this next phase of tackling my demons.  I've read about all I can read (Whole 30, Potatoes Not Prozac, Stop Your Sugar Addiction Today, The Paleo Plan, etc.) and guess what?  They all basically say the same damn thing to me.

I need to get sugar and most carbohydrates the hell out of my diet. 

I've known this for a long time (like I knew I needed to quit smoking and drinking...duh) but I've been igorning it, trying to moderate, trying to make it work my way.  Guess what else?  I suck at this making it work my way thing.  Yeah...like I didn't already know that.  Geez...

Anyway, for some reason that I can't figure out, this time is different.  Just like it was when I finally walked away from cigarettes and chardonnay...this time my heels are dug in and I'm going at this thing.

Here's how I know...

The withdrawals that I'm feeling and the things that I'm going through are EXACTLY the same ones that I experienced both with nicotine and alchohol.  I think I'm a pretty logical woman.  I'm know I'm a smart woman.  I can do that math.

This morning I woke up and found myself seated firmly on a pink cloud.  Haven't been there in awhile but I sure as hell recognize it.  That feeling of feeling good not only physically but psychologically as well.  Being proud of what I'm doing and knowing its the right thing.

Even though my pants were way too tight this morning, I didn't say one negative thing to myself or about myself.  It is what it is and it won't be that way long.

While I'm not sure I can grasp "forever" yet, I know I can do this for 30 days and I'm only promising myself those 30 days.  I'll reasses later.

I hit my "rock bottom" when my scale hit numbers I've never before seen.  I didn't cry (which I usually do), nor did say, "well fuck it  - might as well eat another bag of chocolate chips".  Instead, a feeling of resolve came over me and I began to plan.  When I start planning I know it's a sure thing.

And as if to solidify this whole situation for me - today something happened that made me SURE this was it.

I pack my food very carefully based on what I've learned over the last few days (I need some almonds in the afternoon, two eggs doesn't cut it in the morning, caffeine withdrawal sucks, "splashes" of cranberry juice in the evening wake up the beast and he pesters the shit out of me the rest of the evening) so that there is no reason for me to "slip".  This morning I walked out of the house without breakfast, lunch or snacks.

Previously this would have been a "fuck it" moment - but not today.  I searched the city (it's a very small city) until I found a restaurant with two boiled eggs and some plain greek yogurt (I skimmed off the fruit and granola and threw it away) so I could have breakfast. I refused to settle for a whole wheat breakfast wrap because I didn't want the wrap.  I returned to that same restaurant for lunch and created a salad that was very close to the one the hubs' makes for me.  At 4:00 or so I'll go down to the little store and grab some almonds.

And here's the most important part...not once did my mouth water for the pastries, bagels and other "breakfast" foods that are usually found in restaurants.  Not once did I crave one bit of it.  What's more...I would have gone hungry or bought some almonds before I caved.

So I'm still on track and since I've never made it to day three before, I take today as a huge victory for me.

Now we'll see what happens tonight.  Last night I threatened the hubs with the knife I was using to cut up my chicken. 

Hubs - "Honey, do you need some help?"

Me (annoyed because he made dinner for everyone else and forgot about me...remember, I'm not rational right now) - "You should probably just walk away and leave me alone right now...I'm armed."

Later...

Me - "You know it's me and not you right?"

Hubs - "I got your back babe."

He's a keeper.

Namaste

7 comments:

  1. I'm glad your dh is being so supportive, he is indeed a keeper ;) Good luck! It sounds like you are doing great!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Such self-discipline Sherry!
    Reading here makes me feel like an overweight, slobbish, self gratifying, undisciplined, multi-addicted, weak, lazy Moo!! . . . Which is probably (definitely) because I am.
    Oh, and envious.
    Keep going from strength to strength, with love x

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yay Sherry! I'm cheering you on. Maybe I will copy you...later, after I hear how it goes for you. It is something I have toyed with for a long time.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lol Sorry but I had to chuckle at this post. I cut carbs and sugar (processed) pretty much completely 18 months ago (except for red wine, I seemed to somehow be able to justify that until January!). The first few days are the worst, headaches & feel a bit like chewing someones arm off late afternoon. I now have protein (meat) for breakfast, sometimes 5 or 6 eggs in a day, yeah ridiculous I know and everyone told me my cholesterol would go through the roof. Well I lost about 12kg over 12 months (I'm useless at converting) and my cholesterol dropped quite a bit. I still have a few kg to go but feel SO much better - no gas or bloating. Add a bit of oatbran into the day - it fills you up and seems to makes me crave water. I think it has helped to keep the Wolf on the leash too, getting sugar cravings out of my system beforehand. Your dh sounds like a sweetie.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Congrats Sherry! I do low carb / low sugar due to some health issues I have. I agree with previous posters. It's hardest the first two weeks. Once you get past that, if you are diligent about not eating them, I swear the craving pass. I was a major carb lover and honestly I don't crave them anymore. I'm not even hungry for the most part. When I am hungry I usually crave protein. It really is a life changer if you can just get past those first couple weeks. I notice if I eat some fruit like watermelon that my sugar cravings immediately kick in. I had a couple bites yesterday with my kids and sure enough last night I was craving cereal. I just turned off the lights and made myself go to sleep. :-) I have tried so many diets and none of them worked. This has been the only thing I can stick to. It makes my body feel good. Now I have incorporated some carbs back in but it's things like carrots, apples, etc. I usually do okay with those but I limit them to one or two throughout the day. Hang in there it gets better and the results are worth it! Oh yeah and every once in a while......eat a big ass bowl of ice cream!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Wow THREE whole days without sugar, maaaaan I'm so proud of you!

    I'm cheering you on too, you are doing great! Big HUG of strenght to you :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. OMG I love the Muppets! Beaker was so funny. Mee-Mee-Mee-Mee-Mee-Mee. And who was the doc? Doctor Bunson? As in Bunson Burner?

    Too funny. :)

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.